Stan Marsh

2 scenarios:

Scope Removed:
1. We keep all 274 aircraft. Whenever one is removed another is replaced 1-1
2. We keep LAX, ONT, and SAT bases. Any new Branded bases, goes to XJT pilots.
3. Whenever SKW adds an airplane, we get one.
4. If Delta and United shrink your feed and reduce your aircraft and we stay the same, since we don't fly for any merging airlines right now. (Delta at LAX does not count, as no Northwest base nearby that would reduce our feed for them there)
5. Any new United feeds will go to us out of IAD and ORD.
6. We all get 5% raises, since it is a privilege that you have us.
7. Nothing else in our contract changes
8. There are some more stipulations, you guys can add a few.

Scope stays:
1. Lists merged by DOH for all three companies (SKW, ASA, XJT) no whipsawing.
2. Branded stays open.
3. If furloughs will occur, it will be after COLA's and then by DOH. Sorry new hires at SKW.
4. All pay for 50-seaters get brought up to our level and you have to add trip and duty-rigs. Basically everyone flies under XJT's contract with the best provisions at ASA.
5. 70-seater pay is proportional to amount of seats you now fly on 2-1 basis. 40% more seats, 20% higher pay.
6. Any more I missed?

Oh and we each get two wives now, provided from Skywest management. Our female pilots get 2 husbands, provided from Skywest pilot seniority list.

Oh and if you don't like either of these offers I got this finger I can give you as a consolation prize.

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"You mean there's actually people who dedicate their life to sticking their hands up somebody's *ss?"

b42day

You missed no shows prior to 10AM, and Jepp revisions to be done by interns...

merit

Hate to break it to you Stan but Branded will be closed with or without SkyWest.

Other than that, keep on dreaming bud.

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X-Ex

Mitch

What about pizza parties? Will there be pizza parties? Picnics?

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Stan Marsh

....
Good adds

Skywest management will have to provide temps to fly for us and pay us vacation time so every employee can attend those pizza parties.

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"You mean there's actually people who dedicate their life to sticking their hands up somebody's *ss?"

TTG

And FA's to "fluff our pillows!"

Maria

I'd rather one husband from the XJT seniority list. As a whole, I think our male pilot group is much easier on the eyes.

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I speak for the man behind the white curtain. He is not affiliated with any company you want to know.

Stan Marsh

lol, Good to hear.

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"You mean there's actually people who dedicate their life to sticking their hands up somebody's *ss?"

bem601

Great offer! I'm all for it! Take that to the bank Skywest.

T/R DISAGREE

Here is my proposal to SkyWest.

We keep all a/c fly them like we are flying them right now. If needed close branded and incorporate those a/c into CPA deals. Leave us the Fcuk alone and have you pilots join ALPA.

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Lionel Hutz: Now, Apu, Mrs. Simpson claims that she *forgot* that bottle of... delicious... bourbon. Brownest of the brown liquors... so tempting.
[holds the bottle to his ear]
Lionel Hutz: [whispering] What's that? You want me to drink you? But I'm in the middle of a trial!